Although it is not shown to have a significant effect on an adolescent’s general self-esteem, quality of friendships during this time can affect children’s future success with forming positive relationships with peer and teachers/adults (Berndt, 2004).
The relationship between two very different young boys, Bruno and Shmuel’s in the film The Boy in the Striped Pajamas is an example of the everlasting bond of a perfect friendship based upon the goodness of each other....
In conclusion, anyone can be a good writer and it is never through magic that this is realized. By following what has been explored in this post and many other writing tips for those who want to get excellent grades, it is only a matter of time and you will be soaring up and even higher.
Now here is an example of an essay. Compare it to your version. If you have made similar points, backed up with quotations and comments, you would get a good mark!